Hatter Goes to The Nutcracker
by notmarge
Summary: Alice takes Hatter to his first ballet, The Nutcracker. A bit o' holiday fluff for your amusement.


I do not own Syfy's Alice.

Hatter Goes to the Nutcracker

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"Okay, what's this thing we're going to see?" Hatter asked his lovely wife as they were leaving their apartment.

Alice smiled at him. "It's a ballet called 'The Nutcracker'."

"Alrighty." He was quiet for a moment. "What's a ballet?"

"It's a dance with music," Alice said enigmatically. She wanted tonight's show to be as much of a surprise as possible.

"Oh, brilliant. I like music."

"Yep."

Hatter decided to give it a shot. "Well, let's give it a go, then, eh?"

They made quite an attractive pair as they walked arm in arm toward the theater. Hatter sported a modern, sleek, dark suit and, of course, a spiffy hat. Alice wore a rich red, single strap evening dress that just brushed the ground and shiny black shoes. Sparkly earrings flashed in her ears and matched the bracelet on her left arm. Her beautiful black hair was done up in an elegant twist and she even carried a small, black clutch.

Hatter was very taken with her appearance. She looked even more stunning than usual and he didn't quite feel spruce enough to be her companion for the evening. The clutch she carried threw him a bit though. He wasn't at all sure what would fit in something that small. It did add to her air of sophistication and so he did not question her about the tiny thing she held in her hand.

As for her part, Alice considered rushing him back home and peeling the sleek suit off him for a while. She could practically feel other women staring at him and she repressed a giggle. Were they aware that this dapper looking gentleman routinely wandered their small apartment clad in a white undershirt, boxer shorts, and socks? Most likely not.

The theater they were attending reminded Hatter of the Great Library in Wonderland. It was beautiful and vast. A full orchestra was arranged for the audience to enjoy a special live musical performance. The excitement was thick in the air and people were quietly abuzz about the evening show.

Alice and her Hatter settled in their first row Grand Tier seats. Hatter started to flip through their playbill, but Alice snatched it out of his hand.

"Oi! I was looking at that," he managed to keep his voice to a whisper. "This is me first ballet!"

She giggled. "Yes, and you're going to experience it purely. If you just have to know something, ask me. Quietly."

He grumbled at her but there was no heart in it. As the lights dimmed, they quieted and listened to the symphony. The curtain remained down throughout the Overture.

After a bit of music, Hatter leaned over and whispered, "Where's the stage and the dancers?"

"This is called the Overture. It plays before the show actually starts," Alice informed him.

"Oh. Why?"

"It's kind of like a musical preview."

"Oh, okay. Why?"

Alice was at a loss. "Well, actually, I'm not really sure."

Eventually, the curtains rose and several sets of couples appeared at intervals, walking across the stage.

"Oooh, I like those hats," Hatter exclaimed quietly.

Alice giggled. She knew he would.

After a moment, Hatter whispered, "Why are they walking all funny?"

"It's a ballet. All the movements are exaggerated."

Alice realized she might have needed to do a little more research into the mechanics of ballet before taking her curious Hatter to his first one. Oh well. They continued watching the performance.

"How come they're not talking?" Hatter questioned.

"People don't talk in ballet. The entire story is told through the dance."

"Um, okay."

The ballet continued through the Christmas party. It was a bit distracting for Hatter that nobody talked, but at least it wasn't boring. When the nutcracker broke, Hatter leaned to her again.

"Hey, that kid broke that thing! Is he supposed to be doing that?"

"Shh!"

When the Christmas tree grew before Clara's very eyes, Hatter gasped.

"Alice! It's like she drank the shrinking potion!"

"Shh!"

When Clara threw her slipper and injured the Mouse King, Hatter whispered again.

"What was that shoe made of? I coulda used it against Mad March!"

"Shhh."

Hatter was quiet until the Snow Spun Angels arrived and started twirling and dancing.

"Alice . . . look, it's snowing! Inside! That doesn't happen in this world, does it?"

"No. Shh."

As the King and Queen of Snow began to dance, Alice thought Hatter's eyes would fall from his head.

"Alice! Alice! That guy is wearing no trousers! Alice!"

"Shh!"

"Alice! He's turned around! Alice, do you see his backside?! Alice!"

"Shh!"

Hatter tried to look away but he couldn't turn his head, or close his eyes, or even blink. He just sat in shocked silence. He felt like he could see _everything_. It was very disconcerting.

Hatter did not move or speak until the intermission. Finally, the curtain lowered and the lights came up. The audience's clapping slowly tapered off and people rose from their seats to move about. Alice turned to her husband, whose baffled expression sent her into giggles. He looked at her.

"What's this about, then? It's over?"

She kissed his cheek affectionately. "No, this is the intermission. We take a break for fifteen minutes."

Hatter furrowed his brow. "Is it so that guy can go find some trousers?"

Alice let her laughter ring out merrily. Hatter smiled at it, though he was still full of questions.

When the second act continued, Hatter sat quietly next to Alice. Through the first few dances. The Sugar Plum Fairy and her Cavalier, the Spanish Chocolate, the German Marzipan, and the Russian Peppermint all seemed to be lovely, fairly standard ballet dance routines.

The Chinese Tea dance sent Hatter into fits. There he was, in the middle of a ballet thing being visually assaulted by guys with no trousers on, and now he was _craving_ tea. Which gave rise to a new thought. An _intriguing_ thought.

"Alice? Would you consider popping out of a tea kettle for me?"

That statement threw her for a moment. "What? Um, no. Um, maybe. Um, . . . shh."

Alice's favorite number was the Arabian Coffee sequence. It was one thing that was different every year. It always seemed to her to be a very sensual dance. She had no idea what Hatter would make of it. A few bars into the number, she felt rather than saw Hatter lean forward in his seat and put his elbows on his knees, chin in his hands.

The male lead wore loose blue pants and no shirt. The female lead was skimpily clad as well with loose pants and a bustier in a complementary lighter blue.

They danced slowly, every movement fluid and tightly controlled. During the sequence, the man lifted the woman over his head, held her there, and then wrapped her slowly and sinuously down and around his neck, torso, and through his legs. Their bodies seldom completely separated throughout the routine.

In the middle, he lay flat on his back and lifted her straight up into the air with both hands and after a moment, turned her diagonally toward the audience. The dancers never trembled, faltered, or stumbled. Every part was flawless.

At the end of the sequence, upon rising from the floor, the male lifted the female straight up over his head with both hands. She remained completely horizontal, her entire body facing the audience. Right before the music ended, he let go with his left hand and held her aloft with only the right one.

As the lights went down on the scene, the audience began to clap in appreciation. Hatter sprang to his feet, clapping so strongly Alice wondered that he didn't hurt himself. After a moment, she pulled him down into his seat once more, trying not to laugh directly at him.

As the applause tapered off, Hatter turned excitedly to her. "Did you see that?!"

Alice nodded and Hatter continued. "No really, Alice, did you see that?!"

She smiled and kissed him lightly. He responded eagerly then drew back.

"After that performance, you're getting more than that when we get home!"

Alice giggled and said "Shh!"

Playful, energetic music exploded into the air. An impossibly tall lady in an enormously wide skirt drifted onto the stage. Alice smiled at the change. The dancing Bon-Bons always followed the Arabian Coffee dance.

She suspected it might be to give the affected adults in attendance the chance to cool down from the sultry dance preceding it. The room always seemed a little warmer after the Arabian Coffee. The Bon-Bons were a sweet, fun distraction.

The little Bon-Bons emerged in a rush from Mother Ginger's dress and began dancing and flipping all over the stage. They wore big, happy smiles and seemed to have unlimited energy.

Near the end of the sequence, one kneeling Bon-Bon was accidently kicked in the face by another flipping Bon-Bon. The crowd tried to suppress their gasps and groans. Hatter all but came out of his seat.

"Oi! You think she's okay?"

The injured Bon-Bon shook her head, momentarily disoriented. Then the resilient little child continued with her routine.

Hatter was clearly impressed. He nudged Alice. "Think we coulda used her against the Suits, yeah?"

Alice nodded. "Might've helped."

As the Bons-Bons started running back under Mother Ginger's dress, two positioned themselves at either end of the stage. They squared off and began back flipping. As they neared each other, Hatter found himself clenched in anxious anticipation of another collision. The skilled children flipped right past each other and continued on. They flipped all the way to the opposite ends of the stage and stopped. Throwing big grins and waves, they ran off stage to the applause of the appreciative audience.

The Snow Queen and Snow King returned to dance again. As they began their number, Hatter face palmed himself and spoke quietly.

"Oh, for crying out loud."

"Shh," Alice said.

Though it was very well done, the final sequences seemed to last forever. By the time, it was over, both Hatter and Alice were fidgety and ready for the ballet to come to an end. They clapped dutifully, hoping to be soon gone.

Sometime later, Alice and Hatter returned the way they had come, once again arm in arm. Alice's feet hurt and she was looking forward to taking her strappy shoes off. Hatter was looking forward to taking _everything_ off of both of them.

"Well," Alice said, after a while. "What did you think of the ballet?"

He seemed to consider the question. "It was, interesting. They had to be really, really strong, you could tell. I think I liked it."

"Do you want to go again?" Alice inquired, hopeful of his answer.

"Yeah," he grinned and spoke honestly. "Next year."

Alice laughed and kissed him. "Me too. I've only got enough in me for one ballet a year."

After a bit more walking, she voiced another idea. "I think I'll take you to a wrestling match in the summer. That'll be different."

Hatter glanced sidelong at her. "Will the guys being wearing trousers this time?"

"Actually, no." Alice realized, laughing again.

Hatter shook his head. "What've guys in your world got against wearing trousers, anyway?"

They laughed together at that one and continued on.

"Now, considering this whole Chinese tea, Arabian Coffee thing . . ." Hatter began, impishly.

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**Here's a bit of holiday fluff. Hope you enjoy! Leave a review if you like.**

**Thanks to Noctural Elle and Mycha for your encouraging reviews! You make my day! **


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